dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.