Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
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