I just made out with a guy for $7.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
