whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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