So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
I can't put those talents on a resume
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
