That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
