so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize
