Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
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