Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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