You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
