maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
