i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
