She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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