Duck Duck Cougar?
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
