I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
