yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
