my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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