worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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