so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize