he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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