i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
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