I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
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For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
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My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize