my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
