this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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