I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
