Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
why do cheetos always look like penises
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize