Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
