Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
