im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize