i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
