well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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