im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
It's shark week go big or go home
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
