True but thats because hes a fetus.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
i dont even know how to be here
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
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I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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