Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
