I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
