Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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