How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
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