I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize
