I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
