i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
