Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
i am craving dick and cupcakes
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
