so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
