oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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