She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Randomize
