Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
