Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize