my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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