Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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