Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
MY FUCKING CAT JUST GAVE BIRTH AND IM FUCKING STONED AND I FUCKING DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
