Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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