Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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