I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.