I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
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